Back when I was a teenager, I had many ambitions – I’ll be honest, I’ve always been ambitious. I dreamed of becoming a psychologist because I loved listening to people’s concerns and understanding their emotions deeply. I also wanted to study filming and arts at my dream college, but financial instability and my typical Asian parents’ disapproval of careers outside their norms made that challenging. Now, in my final year, I pursue a major I have no passion for. My ambitions? Well, now I dream of having a home. You could say I’ve let go of those big dreams.
Reflecting on my journey, I realize I was chasing tangible achievements to impress others. But as I’ve grown, my heart is exhausted, the little creature in my head called anxiety keeps pushing the button making me feel fragile at the slightest touch.
I’ve learned many lessons chasing these dreams, but along the way, I lost sight of how to truly understand love. I was taught – and sometimes learned the hard way – that love meant blowing at your children to show you care, that being strict molds character, and that silence often spoke louder than words.
I felt I needed to be perfect to earn love, to prove my worthiness to hear kind words, to achieve something enormous for admiration, and to look flawless for acknowledgment. These were the harsh lessons I learned about love.
Yet, the internet and friends have shown me there’s a softer, gentler side to love. I’ve been smoothing out the sharp edges of my perspective, learning that love can be kind, patient, and accepting. I’ve been polishing these edges, realizing that perhaps my biggest dream isn’t grand achievements, but rather a simple home – a sanctuary of security, warmth, and feeling enough. A place where communication and assurance replace conflict and doubt. Where I’m valued for who I am, not what I achieve.
Dreaming of a home isn’t just about bricks and mortar, it’s about finding belonging and embracing life’s simple joys. It’s about watching sunsets with a heart full of hope and a future filled with possibilities.
So, when asked about my dream, I simply wish to build a home filled with comfort and happiness.
